Meet Lola…. A guide to a Haute Holiday for all Mamas!! This is a MUST read!!
We told you a few months ago we were bringing on a guest writer from LA. A very dear friend of mine whom always has words of wisdom. I could go and on but there is no need. Once you read on you will know exactly what I am talking about!!! Everyone needs a Lola in their lives. I am sharing mine with you!!! There is not much more for me to say but I introduce you to Lola, a woman with all the answers….. Xo Christina
[DISCLAIMER: I’ve coined the term “HoneyLove” to represent husbands, boyfriends, lovers, and mates of all kinds. If there were a neutered, politically-correct, all-inclusive way to represent all of the possible variations on the “other half” I would use it, but “Gorph” didn’t flow].
Let me be frank. Tis the season to get what you want. Don’t you give, give and give 365 days a year? Wouldn’t you like to get a little something sparkly or just plain fabulous when you wake on your holiday of choice? All year you read this blog and yearn for the gorgeous styles and unique accessories that the Three Haute Mamas feature in their fabulous posts. Well I am here to tell you that everything you desire is within reach, and can be yours, all yours! – if you just ask.
If only it were as easy as sitting on Santa’s lap, biting his left lobe, and then whispering in a sultry, low voice, “All I want for Christmas is a pair of blood red fringe-maned Interlopa Louboutins.” After he checked you off the Naughty list, Santa would fly straightaway to the North Pole and call Christian personally to demand your magnificent, custom-made shoes (signed, of course). But make the same request to HoneyLove, and he will likely just turn his head to excitedly make out with you, and forget all those long, silly words; come Christmas morn, you will instead find yourself unwrapping a pair of blood red window blinds, custom-made at Blindster.com (and his sad excuse: “I thought you said ‘louvered’.”)
This year, it’s up to you. You have a choice. You can make HoneyLove a list, give him specifics, and on the big day, open your treasures with a smile. It’s so simple! But I know, you want more. You want the element of surprise; the knowledge that he – yes YOUR he – actually chose that sparkly sweater and those brilliant baubles all by himself. Well, we all want the fantasy, Mamas, but I’m here to slap you with the hard, cold hand of truth – he will be choosing the gifts, but if you don’t give him guidance, YOU will be the one standing in the mile-long line to return them. Do you want to spend January in your old yoga pants, chatting with Customer Service at Sears? Then stop reading now. But if you want to spend it showing off your new platinum diamond-scroll pendant over lunchtime martinis with your fellow mamas, then read on. “But telling him what to get for me takes all the romance out of it!” you protest. You’re right. It does. But tell me – what is romantic about an 18-volt cordless drill with keyless chuck? Because that’s what you’re going to get if you don’t speak up. Mamas, trust me – follow these simple steps, and you can have romance, surprise, AND the pretty things you truly desire and deserve.
1) MAKE A LIST. You don’t have to detail each and every item that you would like. To keep the element of surprise, just give him a list of your favorite stores, your favorite colors this season, and your sizes (be specific! Such as: “Pants – size 10. I know this level of detail is new to many of you, and I can already hear the denial – “I don’t need to give him a list … he already knows my favorite colors and sizes.” Of course he does. Enjoy unwrapping your new police scanner.
2) CHECK IT TWICE. Did you include any family-owned businesses on your list? The sales assistants at smaller stores and boutiques often give more personal attention to their customers. Who would you rather have assisting HoneyLove – the seasonal, part-time student college-age staff at the largest lingerie chain in the nation (hello, six-for-$25 undies and gallon of pink perfume), or the owner of the elegant boutique on your town’s main street, who carries high-quality, unique brands and knows how to style an ensemble? Encourage HoneyLove to spend his time and dollars at a boutique, and he will support your local community while supporting your clothing, jewelry, and/or lingerie habit.
3) BE NAUGHTY. Speaking of lingerie … why did you give up wearing sexy lingerie to bed after you had your second child? And why did you give up wearing colorful, lacy underthings at all? You might spend your days shuttling between school, the grocery, dance classes, soccer practice, and the homefront, but you can be an efficient and effective Mama in a pink lace thong as easily as you can in white cotton briefs. Remember you are a HAUTE Mama, and that also goes for what doesn’t show. If you haven’t bought any new pieces for yourself in a while – for daytime or bedtime – take a little field trip and purchase a couple pieces. Provide guidance to your sweetheart as to your preferences – again, you don’t have to be terribly detailed, but “silk or satin, no feathers, must cover butt” and the like is fine. And then wear whatever he gets you – don’t be critical, of him or of yourself. We are all perfectly imperfect, including the tummy you earned giving life to your children, the few extra pounds from meals shared with friends, and the stretchmarks that naturally come with growing older and wiser. Be proud of your beautiful body, and let your HoneyLove help you celebrate it. (VERY important message here!!)
4) BE NICE. A truly Haute Mama is a charitable mama. While we love our sparkly stones from Hearts on Fire, our high-low adventures in fashion, and the occasional night out on the town, we also know that there are many mamas who struggle just to fulfill their basic needs. The holidays are an important time to come together as a family – whether it’s just you two, or you are blessed to have a brood – and talk about how you can best share your time or money with those less fortunate. If you would like to donate your time, Google “[your city] volunteer” for organizations that place volunteers with schools, shelters and other agencies who can use your help for an hour or for a day. If you would like to donate money, visit CharityNavigator.org to find worthy local and national charities where your money will be used effectively. The Ellie Fund, Rooms to Grow, & b Positive project are close to the Three Haute Mamas hearts, but there are many worthy charities that can use your help.
5) BE GOOD FOR GOODNESS SAKE. (Good to yourself, that is.) The best gift you can give yourself during the crazy holiday season is a break. Allow others, including HoneyLove, to take care of you while you take care of everyone else. Although we love to give and (of course) to get, the true meaning of the holiday season is sharing meaningful time with the ones you love – and YOU are one of those people! While you bake for the kids’ parties, wrap presents after bedtime, and keep juggling all the other balls in the air, remember one of the most important people you need to take care of is YOU. Make time for friends who make you laugh (shopping date, anyone?!); cut back on a few gifts for the kids and use that money to hire a babysitter, and enjoy a quiet dinner out with HoneyLove; or ask HoneyLove himself to take the kids to a movie so you can just sit with a magazine and a glass of wine, and maybe even enjoy a bath. DO NOT USE THIS TIME TO CLEAN THE HOUSE (Another important message!!) Giving yourself a few moments of downtime during the busy season will benefit everyone else in your life, tenfold.
With warm wishes from the West Coast for a happy and enjoyable holiday, I close with words from three of the wisest women I know: LIFE IS SHORT – MAKE IT HAUTE!